Chuck Norris Jokes For Celebrating His 74th Birthday

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Chuck Norris

Happy birthday Chuck Norris! 

On Monday, American martial artist and actor Chuck Norris turned 74. The only thing more popular than his roundhouse kick are the Chuck Norris jokes that of the “Walker, Texas Ranger” star made about him being supremely hardcore, no matter his age.

His fans on Twitter believe he is just as tough as ever. "Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate turning 74, the number 74 celebrates being associated with Chuck Norris.”

Another joke came from @CariHi967: “Chuck Norris is 74 today! And remember, he doesn't blow out his birthday candles. He stares at them and they extinguish themselves.”

In honor of the action star's 74th birthday, the International Business Times has compiled some of the funniest Chuck Norris jokes, courtesy of ChuckNorrisFacts.com and CodeSqueez.com:

-- When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone, he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris.

-- Chuck Norris counted to infinity—twice.

-- When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room.

-- Chuck Norris can delete the recycling bin.

-- Some magicians can walk on water. Chuck Norris can swim through land.

-- Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.

-- Chuck Norris doesn’t call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

-- Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that’s why there are no signs of life.

-- Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter.

-- Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.

-- There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

-- Chuck Norris can speak French in Russian.

-- Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

-- Chuck Norris doesn’t flush the toilet, he scares the sh*t out of it.

-- Chuck Norris works out 25 hours a day.

-- Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

-- The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

-- Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.

-- Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.

-- Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.

-- Chuck Norris doesn't wear sunscreen. The sun wears Chuck-screen.

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