Colin Quinn Twitter Diatribe Redux: I Should Produce the Oscars

I will produce the Oscars myself, Quinn tweeted. Ideas: Release thousands of rats during the middle of the show to keep audience excited!!

For the last two days, @iamcolinquinn has been tweeting almost exclusively about his fantasy Oscars:

More Oscar ideas: Get somebody to train a real cat in martial arts and then put him on the stage and the presenters have to fight him.

Then a bum walks through the crowd everybody goes: What's that effin' bum doing in here? [sic] Then he pulls off fake beard, it's Ryan Gosling!

After Eddie Murphy resigned as host, Quinn continued to campaign on behalf of himself and fellow Saturday Night Live player Seth Myers.

Just got news about Eddie Murphy dropping out. I'm here. @sethmeyers is here.What the eff? Is there a problem I don't know about?

I have @sethmeyers21 come out wearing Joe Paterno glasses. 'Oh, sorry, I'm looking for Sandusky is this the kids choice awards?

Then if the audience starts booing it sets off a sensor that releases a bunch of tomatoes from the ceiling. They ruin everybody's outfits.

Quinn is full of ideas (a few of them funny) for a show that mocks the Oscar's tendency to play like a self-congratulatory circle jerk.

The audience forms a gauntlet and the winners have to run through and everybody's spitting on them and taunting like Sean Penn in Bad Boys.

Then it's live feed from prison. Dr. Conrad Murray he goes 'I sold half of you mothereffers drugs now don't deny it!' Whole crowd looks down.

Then we come back from commercial, 'I just married and divorced Kim Kardashian during the break!'

Then I go Bernie Madoff is in the news again. Thank God none of us were dumb enough (camera cuts to Kevin Bacon). I go my bad

It should come as no surprise that Quinn couldn't resist making a jokes about both Gadhafi and Steve Jobs - although (or perhaps because?) he faced backlash for his tweets about both of their deaths in October:

Then during the people we lost this year in Hollywood I slip in a picture of Ghaddafi [sic].

Then you bust out a Steve Jobs tribute. Everybody holds up their Iphones [sic] in silent tribute. Then cut to Bill Gates trying not to laugh.

Earlier this week, Quinn spoke to New York Magazine about the accusations he made against Will Ferrell earlier this month, beginning the day after Farrell was awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. In the rant, Quinn claimed that Farrell had a drug problem and that he stole the idea for Anchorman from Quinn.

Quinn told NYMag that he was being sarcastic, and blamed the media for (perhaps intentionally) misconstruing the sincerity of his tweets.

You know, I think the problem is that they're like, We gotta get something. Everyone is tweeting such boring stuff; we gotta pretend this is real just to create a thing, he told NYMag.

When asked why he targeted Ferrell specifically, Quinn said, Because I know him, and he's just the straightest, cleanest guy. He's the least egotistical of anybody in show business, the most normal guy. So I was trashing that.

There's truth to all jokes, he later added. Not Will Ferrell being a drug addict, but when I say this is not where I want my career to be, I mean it sometimes. It's always ironic, but it's not always funny unless you have a little truth in certain things.