Halloween may be the spookiest holiday of the year, but you don't have to spend it cowering in fear. Forget the horror films — you can giggle your way through the day by telling jokes.
Collected from Jokes4Us, Halloween.com, A Mom With a Lesson Plan and Psychology Today, these kid-friendly quips are sure to leave you laughing on Oct. 31. Share the candy corny puns with your family, classmates, coworkers or Facebook friends. You'll find there are no tricks here — only treats.
What's a witch's favorite subject?
What kind of music do mummies like best?
What do monsters always turn on in the summer time?
The scare conditioner.
Where do vampires go to get cash from the ATM?
The blood bank.
Why don't witches ride their brooms when angry?
So they don't fly off the handle.
What did the bird say on Halloween?
Trick or tweet.
How can you tell vampires like baseball?
Every night, they turn into bats.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?
He had no body to go with.
What do you call a fat jack o' lantern?
What do ghosts like to eat for dessert?
Why'd the headless horseman start his own business?
To get a head in life.
What did one bird say to the other?
Why are ghosts such messy eaters?
Because they're goblin.
How do monsters tell their futures?
They read their horrorscopes.
What medicine do vampires take when they're sick?
When do ghosts eat breakfast?
In the moaning.
What's the best Halloween candy to east on the playground?
What do you call two spiders who just got married?
Who did Frankenstein's monster bring to the dance?
What's a vampire's favorite ice cream flavor?
How do ghosts get dressed up?
They wear ma-scare-a.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
What do you have when two witches live together?
What's a monster's favorite food?
What do you have when you drop a pumpkin?