The hype was incredible. It seemed nothing else mattered in the world aside from when Apple would reveal the highly-anticipated (understatement of the year) iPhone 5.

Unfortunately, at Tuesday Let's Talk iPhone event in Cupertino, Calif., Apple instead unveiled the iPhone 4S, essentially an updated model of its current iPhone generation, which has disappointed some.

The iPhone 4S, available beginning Oct. 14, has an 8 megapixel camera, 1080p video recording, faster A5 processor & graphics, improved antenna design and a better battery life. Priced at $199 for 16GB, $299 for 32GB and $399 for 64GB, it will also have an A5 dual ARM core processor, which will upkeep battery life along with making it significantly faster than the iPhone 4.

Notably, its best new feature is Siri, which acts as a personal assistant, providing voice recognition and text to speech capabilities. Siri will allow iPhone 4S users to speak to their device to automatically call a friend, look up a restaurant, tell what time it is or how the weather is and much more.

In light of the addition of the Siri personal assistant, I thought it would be great if we listed 25 features we really hope the iPhone 5 to have, whenever it finally comes, most of which would require a human personal assistant. Hey, I can dream right?

1. Create jobs.

2. Watch all of the new fall television series on networks for me and tell me what happens so I don't have to.

3. Expand to become a tablet and contract when I want it to fit in my pocket.

4. Go through airport security for me.

5. Sync with my blood alcohol level and prohibit drunken texts from being sent.

6. Autosend my Facebook friends a message on their birthdays, because I surely cannot remember.

7. Act as a debit card so I don't have to pay Bank of America a $5 debit card fee.

8. Automatically send Bernanke hate mail from me, anonymously.

9. We already have Google Earth....why not come with Google Space?

10. Explain to me, in detail, why exactly the Kardashian family is famous.

11. Automatically unsubscribe to the spam e-mail messages I am tricked into signing up for.

12. Program my voice so I don't have to call my mother every day to check in.

13. Photograph things automatically that I would want captured.

14. Fix the economy. Globally.

15. That reminds me....establish world peace, too.

16. Button the buttons on my dress shirts properly for me.

17. Use Rick Perry's voice to announce when people call.

18. Check into places for me.

19. Be priced at $99 without a contract, a la the HP Touch Fire Sale.

20. Make tangible, holiday-inspired origami creations so I don't have to buy my family gifts.

21. Instead of advising me how to save money, actually physically hiding it from me in a savings account.

22. Using the touch screen to roll sushi for me.

23. Read books for me and give me the Cliff's Notes versions a la Apple's Summarize Service.

24. Come with a pullout switchblade.

25. Include an app that shoots electro shock into my brain before I say something utterly stupid.