If Kim Kardashian failed to break the Internet last week, it's ESPN's Mike Golic's turn. The 265-pound former NFL defensive lineman oiled up for a “Crack the Internet” photo shoot, emulating Kardashian’s “Break the Internet” shoot for Paper magazine last week, after he lost a wager with Mike & Mike cohost Mike Greenberg over the Notre Dame Fighting Irish vs. Northwestern Wildcats barn-burner football game last week.

Golic’s photo was slightly less polished than Kardashian’s shoot. Golic was joined by family, who took to Twitter to air their grievances about the catastrophe they were witnessing. Without further ado, here is a 51-year-old man naked and oiled up with a strategically placed gift bow stuck to his backside:

Golic, a diehard fan of his alma mater Notre Dame, has a history of making 9and losing) often ridiculous bets. Earlier this year, he made a wager with Mike & Mike board operator Bubba Peregrin that if Peregrin’s beloved Dallas Cowboys finish this season with a 11-5 record or better, Golic will send Peregrin on an all-expense-paid trip to an NFL playoff game, which would include airfare, hotel fees and the best possible game tickets he can get. If the Cowboys finish 10-6 or worse, Peregrin will be Golic's personal butler. The Cowboys are currently 7-3.

Golic and cohost Greenberg have bet every year since 2004 on who will pick a better NCAA March Madness tournament bracket with some embarrassing stakes on the line. Golic is actually ahead 7-4 after winning the most recent “Best of the Bets” wager, in which Greenberg had to undergo the worst challenges since 2004, which included getting his eyebrows waxed, singing karaoke, participating in an eating contest and milking a cow.

Some highlights of the yearly bets:

  • In 2009, Golic waxed his legs live on the air after losing to Greenberg.
  • In 2011, Golic came out on top and Greenberg had to dress up as Justin Bieber for a day and sing one of Bieber’s songs on air. (All things considered, it was a nice alternative, because if Golic lost he would have had to dress up as Lady Gaga, which could have been equally as bad as the butt photo.)

See all of the wagers made here.

Golic’s made some tame wagers, too. He often bets with sports celebrities on Notre Dame games, making the loser wear the jersey of the winning team. In 2012, he won a bet with Michigan State alum Magic Johnson over a game between their respective teams that saw Magic don full Fighting Irish gear. Earlier this year, he made the same bet with ESPN analyst Danny Kanell for a game between Golic’s Fighting Irish and Kanell’s alma mater Florida State. Golic lost that bet and donned a No. 13 jersey, which Kanell wore as a quarterback for Florida State.

By the way, if you were wondering, below is what it’s like to oil up Mike Golic, courtesy of poor Mike Golic Jr., who along with his mother, was present for the entirety of his father’s butt photo shoot.

You can see more Twitter highlights of the shoot here. As if all of this isn't disturbing enough, Greenberg felt the need to mention on this morning’s Mike & Mike that he was having a “colonoscopy and an upper endoscopy” during Golic’s photo shoot.