Vladimir Putin’s Top 10 Statements on Running for the Russian Presidency in 2012

10. “Now I get to be ‘Batman’ again, and Medvedev will be ‘Robin’.”

9. “I want to be Russian president more times than Billy Martin was the Yankee manager.”

8. “Constitution? What constitution?”

7. “I wanna thank Dmitry Medvedev for being such a fine puppet, uh, I mean, uh, president!”

6. “Will I win the 2010 election? Let’s just say all the ‘polls’ say ‘it’s lookin’ good, it’s lookin’ real good’!!”

5. “I can’t wait to tell Merkel and Sarkozy some of my wildly humorous anecdotes about what a crazy drunk that Boris Yeltsin was!”

4. “What you call ‘repression and fear,’ I call ‘practical executive management skills.’

3. “I figure an endorsement by the Russian Tea Party will make me a shoo-in!”

2. “Yeah, life in the KGB was just like those ‘James Bond’ films – minus the cool gadgets, swanky cars and hot chicks!”

1. “Ah, Moscow in winter – can you say ‘paradise’”??