Super Bowl XLVII kicks off on Sunday, but the action is already heating up: chicken-wing prices are through the roof, Beyoncé may or may not actually sing live during the halftime show, and no less than three Super Bowl commercials are being called racist. So regardless of whether you’re rooting for the Baltimore Ravens or the San Francisco 49ers this year, you might be better off if you don’t watch the game completely sober. And let’s be honest: If you’re like most Americans, you won’t.
Fortunately, a host of Super Bowl drinking games has cropped up this year to help you on your way. The games range from the didactic to the deviant, from the simplistic to the sophisticated. But for this most American of traditions, you’re welcome to sample them all -- as long as you do so responsibly, of course. Below, IBTimes put together a list of some of the best drinking games on the Web.
Entertainment website Crave Online lists drinking games at four different levels: Rookie, Veteran, MVP and Prop Bets. The rookie level is easy, with players instructed to take one drink every time they see a beer commercial, car commercial, movie commercial, etc. But the rules get more complicated at the higher levels (presumably played later in the evening when viewers are considerably more tipsy), when players must divide into two teams pitted against each other. Let the infighting begin. Full Game
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Where else but Chicago could we get a Super Bowl drinking game from someone who is tired of the Super Bowl hype? The Bears haven’t won the big game since 1985, and Alex Quigley of the Chicago-based lifestyle website Redeye thinks this year’s Ravens/49ers face-off is the least-anticipated one in years. But that didn’t stop him from devising a pretty clever three-part game, one for the pre-game, one for during the game, and one for the post-game (if you make it that far). Just a fair warning: If the 49ers win, Quigley wants you to take 49 drinks. It’s worth mentioning that they’re favored to win by 4.5 points. Full Game
The earnest brainiacs at Nerd Scholar have whipped up what they’re calling the “Unofficial Super Bowl Drinking Game for Super Bowl XLVII.” We didn’t know there was an official one, but either way, the fact that this one has you “drink every time Jim Harbaugh throws a fit” is reason enough to give it a try. Other rules include drinking every time someone mentions the Beyoncé lip-sync scandal, and drinking every time a commercial features a talking animal. Should be a high-scorer. Full Game
Standing Room Only
Rich Levine, columnist for Sportsnet’s “Standing Room Only” and an avowed New England Patriots fan, lamented the fact that his beloved Pats aren’t in the game this year. At the same time, he posted a drinking game that could potentially ease the presumed suffering of countless Pats fans in New England and beyond. It’s a long game, which means a lot of drinking, so be warned. Rules include sipping every time you hear “America’s Most Watched Network,” swigging for every shot of a 49ers fan wearing deer antlers, and wolfing down a full chug every time Dan Marino makes a statement about his love child during the pregame show. Full Game
Super Bowl XLVII will be broadcast live on CBS from the Mercedes-Benz Superdome in New Orleans. Kickoff time is 6:30 p.m., EST.