Forget The Decision. This Dwight Howard thing may never end. And Blake Griffin's staying put (big surprise.) In the absence of big-name acquisitions, NBA news this off-season has been dominated by players who went pro during the Clinton administration.
The NBA's latest trade news and signings hearken back to the 1990s, with uber-veterans like Jerry Stackhouse, Rashard Wallace, Ray Allen, Steve Nash, Jason Kidd, Kevin Garnett and Tim Duncan dominating headlines.
Jerry Stackhouse is the latest senior citizen (by NBA standards) to make headlines this free agency period, as the 17-year veteran guard has verbally committed to the be a member of the Brooklyn Nets under a one-year, $1.3 million deal worth $1.3 million, sources told ESPN.com.
Yes, this is the same Jerry Stackhouse your college graduate son had on his wall growing up next to his fading Michael Jordan poster. The one who averaged just 3.6 points in 30 games with the Atlanta Hawks this year.
And he's not the only gray-hair to make major news this year. Not by a long shot.
The Miami Heat are snatching them up like old folks snagging Bingo cards on chocolate pudding night. On Wednesday alone they signed two choice specimens.
Everyone knows that Ray Allen, the Boston Celtics' 36-year-old sharpshooter -- who's been in the NBA long enough (16 seasons) to have the record for the most three-pointers ever made by one player in the history of the league -- is going to join young bucks LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh in South Beach.
And though they're not paying quite as little as the bottom-of-the barrel Stackhouse bucks, his bone spurs and other issues are still severely hampering his earning potential. Despite his age and injuries, the Miami Heat were still comfortable to offer Ray Allen a three-year, $9 million contract with the defending NBA champions. That's a bargain considering his career to this point, but who knows if he'll make it three months on those aging stems, never mind three years.
But on Tuesday Pat Riley also went out on a limb and signed 32-year-old forward Rashard Lewis, who will pull down the veteran minimum salary of $1.35 million per year for two years, the second of which is a player option.
So that's a small fortune for a combined 68 years of experience (wear-and-tear) on two Heat players. Let's hope, for Heat fans' sake, that they can still spread the court and knock down threes from the corners.
In more NBA geezer news, aging point guards are apparently in high demand this year. If you've ever been a great point guard, one who got MVP awards and maybe even won a championship, NBA teams were chomping at the bit to get you.
So Steve Nash and Jason Kidd were both dealt to great fanfare, each hoping to get out of Dodge and add a ring or two with a new, solid team to their resume.
Steve Nash is 38 years old, and he has 16 NBA seasons behind him. The Los Angeles Lakers apparently find that highly appealing, so he conferred with former rival Kobe Bryant and decided to pack up and head out to L.A.
And his sweetheart deal -- three years, $27 million at his age -- couldn't have hurt when he was weighing his options for what will likely be his swan song.
Meanwhile, Jason Kidd is headed to the New York Knicks, who will more than likely be losing promising, young point guard Jeremy Lin. Why sign Kidd, who will turn 40 by this time next year, and let Lin slip away to the Houston Rockets? Why not? All the cool teams are picking hobbled elder statesmen over spry up-and-comers. And, hey, they got a bargain at three years for $9 million.
And the Boston Celtics were willing to spend big money to keep 36-year-old Kevin Garnett, who took their offer rather than skip Beantown with his fellow Big Three member, Ray Allen.
And a small investment it certainly was not for the Celtics, as he signed a three-year $34 million deal to stay in green-and-white alongside fellow geriatric Paul Pierce, rising star Rajon Rondo and the rest of his team.
That's practically identical to what the San Antonio Spurs decided to do with franchise player Tim Duncan. The aging superstar, who is also 36, also signed with his team for three years at $34 million. Fine, it is identical to Garnett's scenario, just deep in the heart of Texas.
There have even been calls for Allen Iverson to return to the Philadelphia 76ers after the diminutive one-time superstar whipped his hometown crowd into a frenzy during the teams postseason run this year.
In other words, what's old is new again, and you wouldn't be crazy to think you had traveled back to the nineties if you knew none of this and turned on an NBA game next season. It's certainly not a brave new world, no matter what they try to tell you about Kevin Durant and LeBron.