I Am A Pole
"I Am A Pole (And So Can You!)" by Stephen Colbert is out in stores. Grand Central Publishing

Stephen Colbert said it himself.

His latest book, I Am A Pole (And So Can You!), released on Tuesday by Grand Central Publishing, would be the perfect gift to give a child, or grandchild, for their high school or college graduation. Also, Father's Day. Also, other times. So don't let the book's illustrations and short length fool you. And don't be swayed by the cover blurb from late author of Where the Wild Things Are Maurice Sendak. This ain't no bedtime story.

It is, however, precisely what you'd expect a book by The Colbert Report host to be: tongue-in-cheek political and social satire (hint: it mentions evolution and Gallup polls). The title is a play on Colbert's 2007 book I Am America (And So Can You!).

Colbert pitched a draft of I Am A Pole to Sendak on his show.

The sad thing is, I like it, Sendak told him. Colbert asked if he could get those exact words as a blurb. Absolutely, Sendak told him.

The story is about a pole who wants to figure out his true pole role. Turns out, there are many things a pole can do and many services it can perform -- ski pole, maypole, totem pole -- so it explores its options, but nothing seems to work out. The story is almost an analogy for the fruitless search for employment that has become the post-college graduation life.

Take this stanza, for example:

There's always fireman's or fishing,/ But those jobs are hard to find./ So I interned as a stripper pole,/ But I couldn't stand the grind.

The last two lines in that stanza are accompanied by an illustration of a female stripper wearing red high-heels, a red thong, and purple tassels. She has the initials SC tattooed on her ankle. Classy.

Don't worry, though. This pole ends up finding his purpose in life (which Colbert revealed on his show).

So yes, if you're looking for an addition to your political bookshelf, head on over to the literary vendor of your choice. Just don't wrap it up and gift it at your friend's kid's birthday party. You'll never get invited to those types of events again.

Wait, on second thought...

I Am A Pole is available in bookstores. Colbert's next book, America Again: Re-Becoming the Greatness We Never Weren't, hits bookstores on Oct. 2.