Nikki Bella
Nikki Bella is still not ready to let go of ex-boyfriend John Cena. Pictured: The reality star attending the People’s Choice Awards at Barker Hangar in Santa Monica, California on Nov. 11, 2018. Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images

Nikki Bella is still not ready to see ex-boyfriend John Cena with another woman. This is what the reality star admitted in the teaser trailer for the season finale of “Total Bellas.”

The snippet reveals that Nikki has finally mustered her courage to go back to Napa, the place where she and John almost tied the knot. She says at the start of the clip that past memories came rushing back to her as soon as she arrived since it’s her first time to be there after their big breakup.

However, Nikki admits that she should just focus on making “new memories” now that they are no longer together. She tells her sister that she “made Napa a lot about the ex,” but now she’s able to come back mostly thanks to her love for wine.

Nikki also drops a bombshell in the trailer when she says that she’s been “crying so much” the day before because it felt like she was finally starting her “true grieving and healing process.”

When Brie asks her if she’s ready to see John with another girl, Nikki straightforwardly admits that she isn’t because it could kill her. However, she says that she should work on this and start to show her ex that she doesn’t care.

“No matter what, the next time I see him with someone it’s gonna kill me. I still have a long way to go but honestly I’m ready for a new me,” Nikki says in the finale teaser. “I need to start living as if I don’t care whose, whether it’s my ex or anyone else, watching me and afraid to hurt their feelings.”

Nevertheless, it’s clear that Nikki has made an effort to fully move on because she dated other men after breaking up with Cena last year. She is currently linked to “Dancing With the Stars” pro dancer Artem Chigvintsev, her partner when she joined the ABC ballroom dancing competition back in 2017.

“They have a strong attraction to each other, but they’re just having fun,” a source previously told People. “They’re both extremely busy with their own careers, so they spend time together when they can.”

Nikki and the Hollywood actor started dating in 2012. They got engaged on live TV in April 2017 after defeating The Miz and his wife, Maryse, at Wrestlemania 33. A year later, fans were shocked when they revealed that they had called off their wedding, as per Us Weekly.

The season finale of “Total Bellas” is set to air this Sunday, March 24, at 9 p.m. on E!