Gabrielle Union Recalls Being ‘Devastated’ When Husband Dwayne Wade Fathered Child With Another Woman

Gabrielle Union has written about a challenging time in her marriage with Dwayne Wade, specifically when he had a child with another woman.

The 48-year-old actress got candid with her feelings about the devastating experience in an essay for Time. The actress recalls the couple’s struggles and emotional journey of going through a series of in vitro fertilization (IVF) treatments and losses before finally welcoming their daughter Kaavia James Union-Wade via surrogacy in 2018.

“In 2013, before we were married, Dwyane had a baby with another woman. It should go without saying that we were not in a good place at the time that child was conceived. But we were doing much better when he finally told me about the pregnancy. To say I was devastated is to pick a word on a low shelf for convenience,” she revealed in her essay.

After a series of miscarriages and failed IVF cycles, there came a point when her husband had enough and tried changing Union’s mind. Wade was alarmed when Union suggested taking the drug Lupron despite knowing about the side effects that include early menopause and brittle bones.

Union wrote, “It was something my husband said that changed my mind. I told him I wanted to try the drug. Dwayne was quiet, then said, 'You’ve done enough.'" The actress further wrote how Wayde looked her in the eye and said, “As much as we want this baby, I want you. We’ve lost too much in our relationship for me to be okay with encouraging you to do one more thing to your body and your soul.”

In her desperation to get pregnant, she did not take the concern too well.

"I didn't receive this as a concern at the time," she said in the essay. "It sounded like an acknowledgment of failure. Because at that point I would have sold my soul to get out of the endless cycle of loss. What was the going rate for souls? What was mine worth, anyway? The experience of Dwyane having a baby so easily — while I was unable to — left my soul not just broken into pieces, but shattered into fine dust scattering in the wind," she added.

Union hit rock bottom after several failed IVF cycles. The actress thought of herself as an utter failure. Talking deeper about her feelings, she wrote, “This woman is such a failure. And she has the nerve to be old. And she has the nerve to have a younger husband. And she has the nerve to stick with a guy who had a kid with somebody else.” The “She’s All That” actress admitted that her “feelings weren’t originating from a healthy place” during that period.

Things finally started to look up for the couple when Union decided to opt for surrogacy, though she still had many fears. Fortunately, those fears were wiped away when she met the woman who carried her child.

Union and Wade's daughter Kaavia James was born on Nov. 7, 2018, via C-section.